Archive for March, 2020

Hello, fellow pandemicians. I know you were all stunned by the decision on March 26 to stop the Candidates Tournament for the Men’s World Chess Championship. I certainly was. The games were exciting and one of the Russians got so cranky and insulted so many people that he was briefly trending on Twitter.

How weird is it that the last sporting event on earth was chess? See, I’ve been right all my life.

I hope you’re doing OK, and that you’re getting your facts from the World Health Organization or the Centers for Disease Control and not from uncredentialed idiots. Tying garlic around your neck or balloons to your ankles or eating 44 tons of plankton a day will not protect you.

Here in Oregon, I’m working from home, which I don’t like – work is work and home is home, and I prefer that they not meet – but at least I still have work. I have my wife and my dog. I’m learning how to talk to them and not just walk absently past them. I’m planning my July retirement party – we’ll be on Zoom or GoToMeeting, each with our own cake. This is not my idea of a good time, but I do like the idea of my own cake. Assuming anyone will be baking cakes.

It’s my task to distract you and help you find alternatives to chess, so here’s a movie I made starring a bird. Here’s the DJ whose live stream is boosting my morale. If he’s not on the air – his hours are unpredictable – here’s a recording of his show at the Slam! Quarantine Festival. This is whom I want to be when I grow up. That is the correct use of “whom.”

Let’s return to 1989, a year when the only things we had to worry about were invading Panama and finishing the World Series following the Loma Prieta earthquake, and listen to some music you older teenagers paid good money for.

Depeche Mode, Depeche Mode 101 (1989)

This double-record set gives us Depeche Mode on the night they ruled the universe, their 1988 concert at the Rose Bowl in Pasadena before 60,000 mesmerized DeModers. It took the Seattle Mariners 12 years to pull 60,000 fans into the Kingdome – and that was the day in 1989 when they promoted the teenaged Ken Griffey, Jr., from the minors.

It took me a long time to engage Depeche Mode in a committed relationship, which seems counterintuitive given my status as a synth-pop artifact. In fact, I panned Depeche Mode 101 in this blog in 2016: “…the songs don’t budge a centimeter from the studio versions. Sorry, boys, but a concert is more than a crowd screaming with joy because you blew up a firecracker. AC/DC would’ve fired a cannon out of a bagpipe.”

But I wrote that after enduring the third Star Trek reboot, which made me angrier than the Hulk trying to play toilet paper bride during a pandemic. Further spins of 101 have given me a different perspective. Sure, Depeche Mode (a former co-worker innocently called them Pesh de Mode) take few chances on these tracks, but overall the drumming is much more muscular and the songs generate far more revolutions per minute.

The audience eats this stuff up – this is the concert where the show ends with the fans still singing the chorus to “Everything Counts” 30 seconds after the band stopped playing. The effect is electrifying, but to give anti-Depeche Mode voices some space here, I’ll quote another former co-worker: “If I went to a show and the band stopped playing and they expected me to sing, I’d want my money back.”

I give Depeche Mode credit for including in their set list one of their earliest hits, “I Just Can’t Get Enough,” from their salad days playing bright poppity pop-pop-pop. That was when the band still had Vince Clarke, who left early on rather than be vacuumed into the gloom machine envisioned by Martin Gore. Clarke did pretty well for himself, founding Yaz (“Situation”) and Erasure (“Chains of Love,” “Who Needs Love Like That?”). By 1988, “I Just Can’t Get Enough” didn’t sound anything like Depeche Mode, but on their big night they played it, and they played it well.

Yaz Fact! The band was called Yazoo in Clarke’s native England, but in the U.S. they were Yaz in honor of former Boston Red Sox left fielder Carl Yastrzemski.

I also give Depeche Mode credit for transforming “Pleasure Little Treasure” – a song with a subtle message: If you’re looking for a reason to live, I’ve got one right here for ya – from filler into a dark, howling rocker.

I love this disc now, but there’s an odd moment when someone in the band asks the audience, “Are you having a good time?” This strikes me as a fundamental misunderstanding of what they’re selling and why people are buying it. Listening to Depeche Mode, you can have an epiphany. You can have an emotional release. You can have a nervous breakdown. But to have something as light-hearted as a good time, what you have to have is Yaz or Erasure.

Greetings! I hope you are well, well-washed, and well-stocked with the essentials of life: shelter, food, water, toilet paper, coffee, music, pets, family, friends, and access to Chessbase.com, which is covering the candidates’ matches for the men’s world chess championship in Yekaterinburg, Russia. (The eight candidates are playing face to face, but without spectators.)

Here in Portland, Oregon, the supermarkets are full of stuff no one wants. The only frozen vegetables I can find are cauliflower and gefilte fish. My neighborhood center has stopped:


6 p.m., Tuesday, March 17. I stood on the center line for almost two minutes.

But I found the silver lining!

Here’s a list of all the things for which we can thank Covid-19:

  1. Renewed attention to the study of corvids, especially crows, ravens, rooks, jays, magpies, and nutcrackers.
  2. Donald Trump has a bad case of Sudden-Reality Shock Syndrome.
  3. Young people are asking old people if they need help. What I don’t like is that they keep asking me.
  4. I haven’t received a rejection from an editor since March 13.
  5. My commute to work is a breeze.
  6. The next chessboxing championship is still scheduled for April 18 in Paris.

 

Year 9 (2019) of Run-DMSteve was a bumpy ride

Here’s an index to what I managed to post:

Retirement

RIP Run-DMIrving

RIP Peter Tork

More tilting at windmills

Forgotten bands:

Attention must be paid

The Beau Brummels

Gene Clark

The Flamin’ Groovies

Ashford and Simpson

The Beat

Bonnie Hayes

Take care of yourselves. Wave from a distance at everyone you love. Special D just made curtains for my new home in the garage.

Random Pan of the Day
Empire Records (1995)
This unremarkable film is set in a record store in the 1990s. No one is tattooed, no one has phones, and the black customers have been locked outdoors. The 15 songs on the soundtrack are mostly easy-listening alt rock, with a few heart-pounders by obscure acts: “Here It Comes Again” by Please, “Sugarhigh” by Coyote Shivers, “Circle of Friends” by Better Than Ezra, and “Ready, Steady, Go” by The Meices. They’ve got an edge, though all of these bands have dumb names.

The only truly memorable song is “This Is the Day” by ’80s romantic synth stalwarts The The. (Their cousins are And And And.) “This Is the Day” plays over the final scene. It’s the only song from Empire Records that gets any airplay today. Naturally, it’s not on the soundtrack.

The pretty, interchangeable young people who work at Empire Records spend most of their time hurting each other’s feelings. I don’t know how I got through the whole thing. Because I was waiting for something better? With Renée Zellweger, an 18-year-old Liv Tyler, a bald Robin Tunney (a year before The Craft and 11 years before The Mentalist), and Tobey Maguire (whose scenes were deleted). Avoid. But don’t avoid The The’s album Soul Mining (1983).